mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
