He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
whose parrot is this?
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
