Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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