ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
