What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Your penis caused this!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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