I feel like I'm in dance class right now
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
