just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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