WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
