are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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