I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
