I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
