But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
this is an emotional support booty call
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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