why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
