i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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