I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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