On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Randomize
