Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
