She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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