I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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