your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
