your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
that may or may not have been my penis.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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