I can feel you judging me through the phone.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize