dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
