ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
