he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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