we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I know her cup size but not her name....
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
