I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Still dying that you shit outside
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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