sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
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