Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
You are a genius and a whore.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
