I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
