Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
