So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
