just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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