Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Randomize
