Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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