some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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