I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
