why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
