Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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