just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize
