So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
