he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
