Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
