woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
