IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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