Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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