She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
