I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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