OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
