DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Someone came in the potted fern
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
